Poon Job's Palace

there comes a time in every man's life when they mus contemplate wearing a man ring. I'm not talking about a wedding ring, cause god only knows when I'll trick some girl into wasting her whole life with me. I am talking about the staple of male jewelry along with the gold necklace hidden among chest hair.
So I was in LA this weekend doing the Hollywood pitch schpeel and whatnot. Figuring out some investor things on a few projects as well as talking to a few studios trying to attach a few projects. The basic shit you see on Entourage. So anyways, I meet with 5 execs this weekend and I noticed that 3 of the 5 were sporting man rings.

One sported what looked like his college ring which is all well and good. I had issues with it cause he didn't win an NCAA championship of any sort and that is the only excuse I would ever give a guy to wear one of those. The next guy wore a glorious topaz stone deal, at least I thought it was topaz. And the final guy sported a gaudy, yet tres hip thick gold band. What did these 3 men have in common?
They were all relatively successful, appear to be rich, and all appear to be single from what I ascertained. Could being single be the key to success? Quite possibly, but I'm thinking its the man ring. Now I just gotta figure out which one would work for me.