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Friday, February 04, 2005 

What happened to you Mr. Boggs?

I'm sitting in my hotel room here in the Dirty South (thats Atlanta for all of you who aren't hip with it) and I decide to watch TV, which is not unlike what I would be doing if I was home and this Medical Hair Restoration commercial comes on. This ad has been on quite a while and features such sports legends as Wade Boggs and Mercury Morris (who I have never heard of however cool his name may be).
I don't know if it was my hatred of Atlanta or its shitty weather but this commercial annoyed me more than usual. When did Wade Boggs become so sad? He says that the hair restoration works yet clearly it hasn't worked for him. Then as the narrator says the description of the product they show Wade Boggs swinging a bat a few times followed by some obligatory posing.
Its like they had nothing for him to do, so the director says, "Hey Wade...why don't you swing that bat there a few times." I'm sure the director followed this comment up by giving a round of high fives to everyone on his crew.
Moral of the Story: Wade Boggs is a sad old man and if you ever see him in a dark alley asking you for spare change, don't give it to him. Cause he sure as hell aint gonna spend the money on his hair restoration.

P.S.- What happened to Semmy?

His hijinks were quite wacky

Apparently we do and you should too

Ceej- you would be stupid not to be interested in the emotional rollercoaster that is Semmy's life

Rover- I believe that "Mrs. Semmy" and Semmy are the same person...as in he made a "wife" up to avoid looking as pathetic when he drools over certain people on the internet. Sadly his patheticness passes yours or CJ for that fact.

And remember...whenever life gets you down, be glad you aren't Semmy

You forget I used to pull teeth for a living and if done properly it doesn't hurt. So quit your whining and find yourself a better dentist. Or, might I suggest brushing your teeth so you don't have to get them pulled. Either way its your own fault.

And who cracked your tooth? It sure as hell wasn't Roy Jones, Jr. No...It was you. Once again...the blame falls solely on you.

I wonder what Semmy is doing right now.
I picture him slathering his "wife" with scented oils as Barry White Plays in the background. He whispers sweet nothings into her ear and makes her writhe with passion and lust. He gently caresses her supple bosom as he kisses her neck. She moans in ecstacy as the heat from his loins becomes overwhelming. 10 seconds later he has finished the deed.
Just to clarify: by "wife" I was referring to his own wang.

I don't apreciate your insulting me. You should all shut up.
-Semmy

I'm not insulting you buddy...I just really miss you.

Ceej- don't call Semmy that...he's a sensitive and caring individual

You shouldn't insult Alex either

However black my heart may be, it is still a heart dammit! Therefore you are mistaken.

I do rock...thanks

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It takes a special kind of stupid to pull that off.

P.S.- Semmy would never do that.

I would if he wasn't living in the land down under where women glow and men plunder. Can't you hear, Can't you hear the thunder? You better run, you better take cover.

If only I knew the rest of the lyrics to that song.

I hope my new post lives up to your low standards

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