Poon Job's Palace

My inner urges to live the life of a bum has surfaced recently on a few occasions. One incident that I can recall (which means recently as I have pissed away or supressed any long term memories) took place last Friday.
After a night of partying (which was supposed to be an early night) I ended up realizing that I didn't have the key to my place at 4:45 in the morning. Sadly security wasn't at their post and my roommates had long since passed out so I was left to aimlessly wander the apartment complex.
The place I stay has a clubhouse that opens at 5:30 in the morning...and that is exactly where I wound up. At this point in time I had reached my second wind and decided that it would be a good thing to go to the gym. It seemed like a good idea at the time...apparently the fitness buffs who actually work out at 5:30 in the morning didn't agree with me.
They were sitting there in their spandex leotards and jump suits, while I was working out in the same clothes I wore the night before. After a rigorous 10 minutes I decided that I was bored and went to the main room to watch T.V.
It was at this point that I passed out. Finally 8 o'clock hit and I decided to check the security post again so I could get in...yet to my dismay the guard was not there. Seeing as I could wait no longer and my true dickhead nature was waiting to come out I decided to wake up my roommate and tell em to open the fucking door.
Luckily they answered on my first attempt and I had finally reached a bed. I had shit to do at 2 in the afternoon so I was forced to go out and function to some diminished capacity. After that was done i proceeded to take a nap in yet another public place. Then I woke up, ate and slept yet again.
I feel this experience taught me how the other side lives. I didn't get to experience drinking my own urine or jerking off random dudes in a subway for quarters...but I think I already know what that would be like.